Short fiction: What a Day

One day I had to stay indoors the whole day because it was raining cats and dogs. I was bored out of my brain. I started getting under Mum’s skin. I thought that she was going to blow her top.

‘Stop getting under my feet!’ she yelled. Well, you could have knocked me down with a feather. Mum never yells at me. I’m so perfect.

So I went to my room to let off some steam. I picked up my favourite joke book. Soon I was laughing my head off. I laughed so much I soon had a frog in my throat.

Later that day my cousin Pete came over. He’s a real pain in the neck. Anyway, we decided to play a game of cards. I knew at once that this was a huge mistake. He started cheating and wanted to change the rules all the time. I couldn’t hold my tongue.

‘Hold your horses!’ I said. ‘Have you got rocks in your head? You can’t do that.’

Well, Pete was really burned up by my little outburst.

‘Hang on,’ he said. ‘Have you lost your marbles? Are you as nutty as a fruitcake? You are really getting in my hair.’

‘And you are driving me up the wall!’ I yelled back at him. ‘And now I’m starting to get a splitting headache!’

‘Don’t scream your head off at me!’ Pete screamed.

‘And don’t bite my head off!’ I shouted.

We stopped yelling as Mum came into the room. We knew that we had really blown it. I knew by the look on her face that we were in the doghouse. This made me feel down in the dumps. I was up to my neck in trouble.

‘Oh, well,’ I thought. ‘No use crying over spilt milk. I might as well face the music. I really am in a pickle.’ But Pete just spat the dummy. He swore at Mum!

‘You are grounded for two weeks,’ Mum said, pointing to me. ‘And Pete, you will not be allowed to visit for a month.’

‘Yes!’ I thought to myself. ‘A whole month without Pesky Pete. That was as easy as falling off a log.’

Copyright 2007 Trevor W. Hampel. All rights reserved.